Monday, July 20, 2015

movement


 I remember when I use to write here everyday. I remember how wonderful that was. 


As maybe some of you have noticed it has been very quiet here. I have written a few times about the struggle of what this blog is to me right now or needs to be and my attempt towards understanding that and how it needs to change.

I considered "officially" closing the blog as I have seen so many people do over the last year. But that just seemed wrong. Then I questioned what is it? This blog? It started as an experiment and in reality an online sort of diary.  A confessional writing exercise that made sense with my art practice.  Then it became a "journal" more about critical writing, thoughts and work of talented fiber artists...I began to be afraid or timid about sharing my own personal journey- how was it to live up to all of this amazing art and amazing artists that I was writing about? It became more about them and less about me.

It opened up doors and provided opportunities.

Then my life changed... so much.

Child born, life moved and uprooted, full time job came back, marriage struggled....

As my statement says   "the autobiographical drives the work and is necessary for it to exist" so as my life dramatically shifted into the realm of a working mother with a broken relationship my work and needs as an artist shifted.  My time and energy was splintered, my art work struggling. The last thing I wanted to do was look at talented artists and write about them. So then what was the purpose of this place. Everyone came here to read about these other artists? And why did that cripple me so much?

In these last few weeks I have really yearned for this place again.  This dialogue which in reality is mostly with myself. This blog has always been for me, my personal journey, for me to archive artists, for me to make community, for me to share my work, my practice, my thoughts. When I started it literally no one except my mom was reading it and I still got up everyday and wrote. Makes me want to revise those first weeks of blogging...

I have no idea what this blog is anymore, but I do know it still has breath in it. So maybe what to expect:

I will be honest I am still not very interested in writing about other artists. Just revisiting the ones that constantly inspire me; Sally Mann, Louise Bourgeois, Tracey Emin, Annette Messeger, etc.

I am mostly not doing fiber right now and it feels really good.

I am drawing with pencil, shooting with a digital camera, and have no idea where I am going but know that I am moving.

And movement feels good.




7 comments:

Katheen said...

I hope you do exactly what you want to do with this blog - you don't owe anyone anything on line except what you choose to share, and if it doesn't work for you, it surely won't work for anyone else. My friend Kathy always says, if it's not a YES!, it's a no. Take good care of you.

Jen said...

I have always enjoyed your personal posts the most. I will keep reading in whatever capacity you write. All the best!

emmel-prutsemieke said...

I still read your blog

Helen Walsh said...

I've followed your blog for a while and like Jen I'm always interested in your more personal posts, particularly how you feel about your work and the thoughts behind it. As a fellow artist and human I find it interesting, inspiring and reassuring to read about your experiences. I started my blog for similar reasons to you and over time these reasons have changed and evolved but I still find it useful and, mostly, enjoyable to be able to share my thoughts in this form. I hope you find a way to keep your blog going that works for you because I enjoy reading your posts!

Di Ellis said...

So lovely to hear your voice again. You were missed.
Obligation stifles, write and or show when you've stuff to mull over and so what if its not fibre. Art is facinating in whatever form it takes.
We are as a breed so unsure and sensitive. I was included in a national print prize one year at a Regional Gallery. The patron/ guest speaker was the head of a very auspicious public institution (who should have known better/ be kinder) and he said at the opening address how dissapointing some of the works were, that they didn't look half as good as the entry pdf's I think 90 percent of the present artists felt he was talking personally to them . We all took his bull shit on board, and our night of celebration was spoiled .
You are a very talented woman and in what ever context your work journeys , there will be people who would love to see your stories. xx Di

Joetta M. said...

I humbly say thank you.

slkrueg said...

You are so brave. You are owning your evolution in your art and your life.
I have neglected my wordpress site. I've also lessened my house cleaning time. I've gotten older and slower. My art takes longer to do and I feel a lack of focus. Drawing is a basic I feel I need to return to in addition to my old friend stitching.
Therefore, I love reading your blog.